There are a few factors involved in determining how much does marraige counseling cost?. The complexity of the issues you want to address, your location, the therapist’s pedigree, and how many sessions you will require, are all factors affecting the cost of marriage counseling. Marriage is one of the most important relationships you will ever have, and committing to marriage counseling is an investment worthy of your time, money, and efforts.
As a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I have had the privilege of working with dozens of couples. Couples counseling can be some of the most rewarding work in therapy because each partner sees the benefit in practice. When a client is working on an issue individually, it may take time to notice the change. When working together as a couple, each positive change is noticeable almost instantly.
How Much Does Marraige Counseling Cost?
The cost of marriage counseling depends on several factors. One primary factor influencing cost is the number of sessions you will be attending. Some couples find relief in as little as a few sessions, while other couples may spend years in counseling. The number of sessions depends on how many issues the couple wants to resolve, the depth of those issues, the willingness of the couple to participate, and the therapist’s effectiveness.
The other important factor affecting cost is the therapist’s rate, as they differ depending on experience, educational background, and location. If you live in an expensive city like San Francisco, the cost of marriage counseling will be much higher than if you seek counseling in Burlington, VT. If you are interested in seeing a very seasoned therapist in high demand, therapy can run as high as $500 per session.
There are affordable options available, such as working with online therapists at Regain.com. Regain charges $60-$90 per week, and communication is conducted via writing, rather than video chat. You can write your therapist as frequently as you need. All writing is shared on a confidential platform for you, your partner, and your therapist to communicate. Many people prefer communicating through writing and find this format very helpful.
As issues get resolved and couples begin to feel more capable of solving their discord without a therapist, sessions can continue on an as-needed basis. If both of you click with your therapist, it can be helpful to have follow-up sessions scheduled on occasion, even during the “good times,” to help keep things harmonious. Counseling during amicable stages in the marriage is like performing preventative maintenance, akin to the benefits of changing the oil in your car.
Types of issues discussed in marriage counseling
Marriages are complicated and it is common to have differences of opinions throughout a long-term relationship. The more challenging the problem, the more sessions will be required to resolve the issue. It is not uncommon to go to couples counseling for one issue, only to discover underlying issues you had not previously considered.
As each marriage is unique, there are a variety of reasons why a couple might seek counseling. A few of the more common issues people hope to resolve are presented below.
Infidelity
Infidelity has a huge impact on a couple. The unfaithful person has to live with their mistake and take accountability. They also have to adopt a great amount of patience as their partner goes through a long process of healing and forgiveness.
The person who was betrayed has to learn to cope with the hurt, embarrassment, and other ramifications resulting from the betrayal. Trust has to be rebuilt and this can be a long and difficult process. Working through infidelity requires a lot of faith, commitment, and support.
Division of labor
Most couples have challenges in deciding how labor gets divided in the home. Whether both people work or there is a stay-at-home parent, dividing labor equitably, is never easy. It can be very common for one person to feel as though they are carrying more weight than the other. Therapy can be helpful in discussing these issues, creating solutions, and examining the efficacy of those solutions.
Libido
Sexual libido ebbs and flows in every relationship but when there is a large divide as to each partner’s preferences, relationship challenges can ensue. Perhaps one partner wants more sex and the other doesn’t. Or one partner wants to be more sexually adventurous and the other partner prefers a more “vanilla” sex life.
Therapists, especially couple’s therapists are thoroughly trained to discuss sexual health and activity. Though some couples may feel embarrassed discussing sexuality, take comfort in knowing your therapist is not embarrassed discussing these topics.
If your primary reason for seeing a therapist is your sexual relationship struggles, there are therapists who specialize in the field of sexuality. They may work with LGBTQ populations, straight couples, open couples, polyamorous couples, and everything in between.
Communication
When we become a couple, we each bring our unique backgrounds and family cultures to our union. If one person came from a family that communicated by yelling, they may tend to yell too.
If a person came from a family that avoided conflict, they too may avoid conflict. Other influences, aside from our family history, impact how we communicate with one another.
Regardless of our communication styles, therapy can help us communicate more effectively with our partners. The better we can communicate with one another, the better we can understand and have compassion for each other.
“A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.” – Dave Meurer
Parenting
Children are a blessing and they are also a lot of work. Many couples struggle with different parenting styles and beliefs about parenting. Even if couples are on the same page with parenting, children direct a lot of energy towards themselves (as is biologically necessary), leaving less energy for the couple.
Therapy can help a couple navigate parenting challenges and help provide them with effective tools to be better partners during this rewarding and challenging life stage.
Finances
Many couples have a lot of fear when it comes to talking about money with their partner. Customarily, one partner makes more money than the other. It is unusual for couples to contribute the same amount of money to their marriage.
Money represents freedom and security, two very important human needs, thereby making discussions about money very complex. Therapists can help navigate these discussions, alleviating some of the stress involved.
Benefits of marriage counseling
There are numerous benefits to marriage counseling. If you and your partner are struggling, but you believe on a deep level your marriage is valuable, counseling can be priceless. Some of the benefits you might expect to experience are presented below.
- A renewed appreciation for one another
- Improved communication
- Improved sexual relationship
- Increased compassion and understanding of self and your partner
- Teamwork mentality
- Renewed romance
- Improved parenting roles and responsibilities
Why should I go to marriage counseling
To find a partner to share your life with is a true blessing. If you dated others before your marriage, you probably know, that it’s not easy finding compatible significant others. If you are one of the lucky people who has found a spouse, but you are currently experiencing difficulties, therapy can help save your marriage.
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy states “Almost 90% of clients report an improvement in their emotional health, and nearly 2/3rds report an improvement in their overall physical health after receiving counseling.” (Therapy, 2022). Therapy is an investment of time, money, and energy but the return on investment is immeasurable.
“To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with”
